I'VE NEVER EXPERIENCED WEATHER.
"I like the rain. I like the rain when I have an umbrella."
To conclude an extremely long and intense Saturday – I do not enjoy football – I continued in my recent bandwagon driven binging of Rick and Morty cozied up on my sister’s couch. With my sister and her boyfriend both passing out one after another only a single episode deep, I persevered. Planning to go out to dinner later, I watched a few more episodes waiting for their revival.
Four hours later and a few episodes turned into too many episodes. Hungry but wary of provoking an irritated, groggy, half asleep zombie response if I disturbed the snoozing corpses, I tiptoed out of the apartment leaving them unconsciously sprawled across the couch.
I thought about taking the bus back to campus, but I’m impatient and waiting at the bus stop for longer than 5 minutes seemed less than enticing. Also, it happens to be a Saturday night on The Ohio State University’s High Street, the week’s peak of entertainment value for High Street’s Drunk People Nonsense. It’s a two mile walk to my dorm from my sister’s place in the Short North, but tonight’s High Street activities distract me from the distance.
Half way through my trek, it starts to rain. Well it doesn’t just start to rain, water starts to assault the BUCKEYE NATION dominated city, its insanely inebriated inhabitants, and I from all directions. The sodden streets empty of its originally alcoholically but now additionally weatherly saturated occupants.Apocalyptically, MIDWAY CLOSES. Even the hour-long line for the highly [freshman] esteemed and beloved Bullwinkle’s breaks up.
I like the rain. I like the rain when I have an umbrella. My rain spattered glasses refuse to perform their sole purpose: helping me see.
The rain regenerates its evil for the whole final 30 minutes of my journey and not much longer after my arrival to the best damn dorm around, Drackett Tower. I dreadfully squeak and squelch my soaked self into the lobby. Two girls look at me and one asks the other “Is it raining?” like the cause of my dripping exterior could be from any other source.
I’m wearing a white shirt.