By Hannah G
“I’m Simone. This is a GenX LA-based super fan account in support of Oscar-nominated actor, Timothée Chalamet”. Seemingly innocent enough, this is the Instagram bio of 57-year-old Simone, a professional movie reviewer in Los Angeles, California. To the ignorant, though a little silly, this account, @clubchalamet at first comes off as endearing. She promotes anything and everything associated with Timmy, down to Wonka-inspired nail polishes and Paul Atreides Funko Pops.
Timothée Hal Chalamet, 28, has exploded into stardom after his outstanding performance as Elio Pearlman in Luca Guadagnino’s Call Me By Your Name Originating from Hells Kitchen, New York, Timmy went to LaGuardia High School with other notable actors such as Ansel Elgort. It also happens to be the alma mater of Nicki Minaj, whom Timothée acknowledges dearly. Belonging to a Parisian family, both Timmy and his sister can speak French fluently. All things considered, Chalamet is a staple name in the industry, and in women’s hearts.
Chalamet has had a slew of notable rendezvous, from the likes of Lily-Rose Depp to Lourdes Leon, daughter of Madonna. Most recently, Kylie Jenner and Timmy have started a fervent romance, complete with Kylie changing her lock screen to a picture of the star, and numerous paparazzi spreads of hot makeout sessions. The internet mogul is abhorrently referred to by Simone as “Slurpee”, citing that their relationship is entirely fake news and for clout that Kylie, for whatever reason, so desperately needs.
“Slurpee’s stalking paid off. Tonight at Beyonce’s concert in LA, what appears to be Timothée, he’s standing there in clear view, smoking a cigarette and talking to his stalker. It looks like they’re meeting for the first time since she’s been stalking his place. What else is he supposed to do, spit in her face? He was probably there with friends and mama kajenner waved her staff and commanded the meeting be filmed”, @clubchalamet typed about a video of Timmy and Kylie getting close at Beyonce’s Renaissance Tour last year.
The detest for this relationship is not unique to Simone; In fact, many Timmy fans are perplexed why someone of Timmy’s caliber would ever date Kylie. Timmy is categorized as someone with high intellect: he plays some of the most sought-after roles in Hollywood with immense range, went to Columbia, and interviews incredibly well, speaking with precision paired with boyish charm. Kylie, is well, Kylie. Despite being a successful businesswoman, she is known for her makeup company, plastic surgery, seemingly vain attitude, and simpleminded quotes. She famously uttered, “It’s always good to like, realize things.” Misogyny aside, it is comical that Simone, who claims to be one of Timmy’s biggest fans, is not supportive of his affinity for Jenner. Logically, if you care for someone, you’d like to see them happy. What is equally if not more comical is that Kylie is scrutinized as being a stalker, and not Simone herself.
“Thank you @pauline.chalamet for speaking with me after your excellent screening of Seasick at @psfilmfest! Thank you for mentioning that you notice the work of Club Chalamet and talking to your lil bro about CC, and him confirming that I’m A-Ok. I’m proud of you both!” Simone is posed with a duck face next to Timothée’s elder sister, Pauline. She has met the former at least twice, and is deluded with the notion that Timmy and Pauline speak to one another about her.
The first thing that might come to mind when you think about the relations between Simone and the Chalamets might be the word parasocial, but the fan rebuffs any assumption that this is the case. In September 2023, NBC news attempted to do a piece about this phenomena and asked Simone for comment, to which she refused. “Parasocial relationships are one-sided relationships, where one person extends emotional energy, interest and time, and the other party, the persona, is completely unaware of the other’s existence…Well, I’m happy to burst your bubble, but please note he knows of me. I have had the incredible opportunity to have met him 4-5 times, got several autographs, a couple pics, two hugs, and he told his sister Pauline that I was ‘cool’. She told me this when I met her after a screening of her short film in Palm Springs because she saw me supporting her work a week prior and was impressed with my style and she asked her baby bro if she knew me.”
The disturbing user has made comments on Timothée’s sex life, was 29 when the actor was born, and takes intense note about his whereabouts, even attending a Brockhampton show because she knew that he might be around. Luckily, it is well known on the internet that Club Chalamet is a neurotic individual who has no chance at seriously being with the man. She does make me laugh though, so for all intents and purposes, I do hope she stays on the internet. She is commonly compared to Octavia Spencer’s Ma from the movie of the same name, a multifaceted character whose actions are driven by a combination of loneliness, trauma, and psychological instability. She also, eerily enough, likes younger men. Need I go on?
I do believe that Chalamet knows who Simone is, as is evident by an instance at the Los Angeles Wonka premiere where Timmy sought her out to snap a quick photo before he was bombarded and clawed at by other fans. Simone has been in contact with Timothée’s team in the past, and even raises money every year on the actors behalf to be donated to charity, Odyssey House NYC. It’s hard not to notice the elder amongst a mass of young fans, and I’m sure he’s appreciative of the work Simone has done, unaware of the extent of her fantasies.
All we can do is sit back and laugh, and hope that it never becomes more than it is at the moment: a sad, obsessed older woman looking for notoriety in a man that will never be with her.
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